To a "Wonderful" Year

Our New Year is a prescribed time for introspection and self-reflection. For many of us, it is a good reminder – then again there are many people who think I spend too much time doing that, so at the risk of reinforcing their point of view, I share some thoughts as we approach Rosh Hashanah.

During these Holy Days, hours are spent in synagogue, ostensibly in prayer, and there are (at least) a couple of fundamental questions many people contemplate: 

• To whom (or what) are we praying?  
• For what are we praying?

That first question can lead in many directions. For some of us, the answer seems simple, i.e., we pray to God, but even how that is defined is anything but simple. For others it can be much more confusing. I’m not advocating a position – this is about contemplation, not answers – but I do think that everyone could agree there are things that we can neither control nor explain. And even if we think it is all completely random, maybe call it “nature”, we can pray, or perhaps hope (Rabbi Jonathan Sacks writes beautifully about the difference between hope and optimism…hope is much more active in his view) that we are positively impacted by those forces, or that we are not negatively impacted by them.

What about the second question? A couple of years ago, I thought about this a lot when a dear friend’s Mom was in the last stages of a battle with the disease that ultimately took her life. As I approached my friend before the Holidays, I was confused about what to say. Happy New Year? It was surely not starting off that way. I finally decided that I would confess my confusion and simply share my feeling that ultimately the best any of us can pray – or hope – for is peace. How we, or the people we love, find peace may differ, but we can all strive for it.

Another thought: I find myself increasingly feeling the need for balance, and decreasingly believing in absolutes or extremes. Somehow the world seems much more nuanced and a lot less black and white. I could go on at length about where and how the importance of maintaining balance applies, but it varies for each of us. So perhaps we pray for the right balance in the things that are important to us…which forces us to first consider what is most important to us.

A parting thought that just occurred to me as I was thinking about this topic: I have been blessed with an amazing role model, a woman who even well in to her 80’s keeps on trying and experiencing new things. My Mom, who is a survivor in every sense of that word, has always remained curious and interested in expanding her horizons and I cannot imagine living my life any other way. In fact, without ever really consciously considering this, I believe it has influenced my own outlook as a parent. So, perhaps we pray to maintain our sense of curiosity and our desire to learn and experience new things.

This in turn led to me to a “chiddush” – a term I learned as a child to describe a new Rabbinic discovery, often concerning a subject that already had been studied and analyzed extensively. 

The word wonder has a variety of uses and definitions.  As a verb, it means to speculate, to question, to ponder...in other words, to be curious. However, as a noun it is defined as a miracle (there’s a word that could use some explanation!), a marvel, a phenomenon. When something is a wonder we view it with awe, with amazement, with admiration. And finally when used as an adjective, i.e., wonderful, it means delightful or magnificent. The act of being curious leads to such great things!

I close with my special wish for each of us to have a wonderful New Year, a year full of wonder.

Before the Festival of Freedom

Passover celebrates freedom. But it also may be the glue that has bound the Jewish people together over millennia, through the best and the worst of times.

It is often reported that some type of Seder is the most widely observed Jewish ritual.  A central commandment – perhaps the central commandment – is to tell, and retell, the story of our emergence from slavery. We involve everybody, including our youngest children, even those who "don't know how to ask." We are also commanded to tell the story as though each of us personally experienced being freed from slavery in Egypt.

Each year, I try to find new and hopefully interesting insights and ideas for discussion. Several years ago we began using a narrative on the second night that tells the story of modern Israel. That helps to keep things fresh and it also reminds us of our more recent history. (I don't "hold" from the 2 day observance of Holidays outside the land of Israel, but that is a topic for another blog – and using a different narrative seemed like a reasonable compromise since I couldn't sell the idea of eliminating the second Seder. I also think it is important that we remember the origins of the modern Jewish State.)This year I plan on using (at least) 2 readings which I thought others might find meaningful, so I share them here.

The first, from Rabbi Jonathan Sacks - I truly admire his writings - speaks to the difference between history and memory. I have read it verbatim before beginning the Seder for the past few years and I anticipate it will be a permanent addition to our Seders.

"There is a profound difference between history and memory. History is his story – an event that happened sometime else to someone else. Memory is my story – something that happened to me and is part of who I am. History is information. Memory, by contrast, is part of identity. I can study the history of other peoples, cultures and civilizations. They deepen my knowledge and broaden my horizons. But they do not make a claim on me. They are the past as past. Memory is the past as present, as it lives on in me. Without memory there can be no identity."

The second is from Menachem Begin as reported by Yehuda Avner in his book The Prime Ministers. I believe Menachem Begin is one of the greatest Jewish heroes. I know he was polarizing, and I know he was imperfect - who isn't?  But I also believe that, so far at least, he is the Israeli leader who has best understood and exemplified the potentially conflicting duality of the continuum of Judaism as religion and nationality. Additionally, he seemed innately sensitive to the notion of history versus memory.  I plan to read this on the second night, when we tell the story of modern Israel, just before or after the paragraph when we lift our wine glasses and recall that in every generation there have been those who have tried to eliminate us.

Avner reports: At a gathering, in May 1981, of approximately thirty young budding Jewish American activists affiliated with UJA, following is a response by Israel’s Prime Minister Menachem Begin to this question from Irving Bernstein the Executive Vice President of UJA, “Would you share with us what you think is the relevant message of the Holocaust for the people here, who are the coming leaders of the American Jewish community?”

Begin replied, “I pray with all my heart that you shall forever enjoy lives of tranquility and security. However, you must always remember that we Jews have a certain collective national experience that goes back many centuries. And in light of that experience, I believe the lessons of the Holocaust are these: First, if an enemy of our people says he seeks to destroy us, believe him. Don’t doubt him for a moment. Don’t make light of it. Do all in your power to deny him the means of carrying out his satanic intent. Second, when a Jew anywhere is threatened, or under attack, do all in your power to come to his aid. Never pause to wonder what the world will think or say. The world will never pity slaughtered Jews. The world may not necessarily like the fighting Jew, but the world will have to take account of him. Third, a Jew must learn to defend himself. He must forever be prepared for whenever threat looms. Fourth, Jewish dignity and honor must be protected in all circumstances. The seeds of Jewish destruction lie in passively enabling the enemy to humiliate us. Only when the enemy succeeds in turning the spirit of the Jew into dust and ashes in life, can he turn the Jew into dust and ashes in death. During the Holocaust it was after the enemy had humiliated the Jews, trampled them underfoot, divided them, deceived them, afflicted them, drove brother against brother, only then could he lead them, almost without resistance to the gates of Auschwitz.  Therefore, at all times and whatever the cost, safeguard the dignity and honor of the Jewish people. Fifth, stand united in the face of the enemy. We Jews love life for life is holy. But there are things in life more precious than life itself. There are times when one must risk life for the sake of rescuing the lives of others. And, when the few risk their own lives for the sake of the many, then they, too, stand the chance of saving themselves.  Sixth, there is a pattern to Jewish history. In our long annals as a nation, we rise, we fall, we return, we are exiled, we are enslaved, we revel, we liberate ourselves, we are oppressed once more, we rebuild, and again we suffer destruction, climaxing in our own lifetime in the calamity of calamities, the Holocaust, followed by the rebirth of the Jewish State. So yes, we have come full circle, and with God’s help, with the rebirth of sovereign Israel we have finally broken the historic cycle: no more destruction and no more defeats, and no more oppression – only Jewish liberty, with dignity and honor. These, I believe, are the underlying lessons to be learned from the unspeakable tragedy of the Holocaust”
 
Wishing everyone a Chag Kasher v'Sameach. Enjoy your family and and your friends, and celebrate!